Sunday, May 3, 2009

grrrr...

Don't really feel like posting today - I had a bit of a crappy weekend & I am feeling even crappier. I fizzled out the past few workouts & now I'm getting that sinking feeling of dread when I think of going back to the gym.....grrr, I hate that. There is def. something wrong if I am avoiding the gym. I thought it was because I haven't been eating too many carbs, so I ate more & it didn't make a lick of difference to my energy, so I had a bit of a cheat meal on the weekend, but now that backfired as my stomach is soooo bloated, feel like someone has punched me in the guts! I didn't get the chance to go to the gym during the day today, so you guessed it I have to now go at the worst time - after 5.30 on a Monday night, when all the weekend warriors feel the need to go to the gym after pigging out all weekend....now I'm one of them .....noooooo!!! Anyway, that is my punishment for having a crappy cheat meal - I tried to make something that was naughty but not too bad, & it was v. disappointing. If I'm going to have a cheat, I may as well get something really good (or bad as the case may be). 

So how many weeks now? 10! Crap, time to pull the ol' finger out. I have reached the point where I get scared to 'go beyond' if you know what I mean. I start to think I look to scrawny & so I sabotage my efforts & pig out. If I'm brave enough, this will be the first time I get past that point.  Wish me luck. 

MM xx


1 comment:

  1. Hence the reason my scales went on holidays! I got scared every time the number went down and would eat more calories just to keep it where it was so I wouldn't get to the scrawny stage. Once I didn't have to look at a number but rather just check myself out in the mirror I overcame this obstacle to broke through that barrier. I had to tell myself that even though I looked good there I had to look better to get on stage. There was no way I was getting up with a fat arse and legs. And now I look and am the happiest I've ever been with my body and can't wait to compete. I'm so freaking excited right now.

    PS Hurry up with the cheesecake recipe (lol) and can I have the sugar free peanut butter cookies too? I luuurrrvvvveee peanut butter.

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